lilcowgirl4:

It’s not that you have issues…… it’s that you have a tendency to continue using instincts you picked up in childhood that are no longer useful to you on your journey towards achieving openness and intimacy and reliability in your personal relationships w others. It’s not that you’re defective or difficult or incapable it’s just that what you learned to do to save yourself from the experience of abandonment or rejection or ridicule or failure is not helpful here anymore and you need to start thinking creatively and collaborating on better ways to cope with that instrinsic fear that you are not correct, that you are faking, that you will be found out and left, whatever it is

saxifraga-x-urbium:

plain-flavoured-english:

Your purpose in life is not to love yourself but to love being yourself.

If you goal is to love yourself, then your focus is directed inward toward yourself, and you end up constantly watching yourself from the outside, disconnected, trying to summon the “correct” feelings towards yourself or fashion yourself into something you can approve of.

If your goal is to love being yourself, then your focus is directed outward towards life, on living and making decisions based on what brings you pleasure and fulfillment.

Be the subject, not the object. It doesn’t matter what you think of yourself. You are experiencing life. Life is not experiencing you.

Thank you this is the first post about self love that hasn’t made me want to throw things

Hello! For all you still here with me tonight, tell me something you want me to write about this year! Writing is my number one goal and I want to produce fun things too! It can be about anything lol

Have a happy and safe night everyone

wholeheartedsuggestions:

you still have so many years to meet so many people you never knew you could love so much

honestly across all of my illnesses, mental and physical, creating and keeping up rituals is the number one and often only reliable way i can live my life

i don’t have the formula for how to make new rituals stick, and i often fail at incorporating them several times until i work it into my daily energy allotment, and i still often fall off the wagon

but i’m going to continue to try to improve this during the next year. my life has been markedly worse since my surgery because i fell out of habit and i want to try to get back what i can

thepersephonecabin:

shoutout to everyone making progress that no one recognized because you never let anyone see your darkest moments. i see you and i am so, so proud of every little step you’re making in the right direction.

star-eaters:

touch starved on main. lovesick fool, absolutely begging for affection on main

i can honestly say that i have managed to remove most toxic influences from my life this year despite everything else going on

there are one or two more huge hurdles i have to deal with on that front, but looking forward i am grateful that i will have time to focus on myself unclouded and what i need to be doing

i do feel pretty isolated as a result, even though i know i made the right choices for me. making new friends at my age starts to get pretty difficult, but i’m committed to trying, and to making sure the friends i already have know how close they are in my heart

i hope that as we all look back over this year despite how hard it was, we can find the bright and shimmering lights that give us hope going forward

wellreadpigfarmer:

I have myself been guilty of this and so I know the continuous pain and pitfalls, and I feel no entitlement to the love of others, but it is a feeling indescribable to love someone for who they are knowing that they do not love themselves and cannot accept themselves as they are so they either feel unworthy of love or feel unable to receive it, and therefore reject the possibility that the need for self growth does not preclude permission to be cared for

But again I myself have been guilty of the same, and I do not know a way to help someone see their own worth other than to continue caring for them honestly, in earnest, with no expectations

I do love you. To be in your company is a bright light through a clouded life, and I feel lucky to know you. It is no matter, but that you are worthy of all the love in the world, and I want you to find it.